The protagonist of this story came to webcam modeling due to financial necessity.
I understood that the freedom I was pursuing was false, I had become a slave to money and what I was doing caused me discomfort.
Photo: Jaiver Nieto. TIME
Outside it was dawn. It must be 6 am on Friday and I was still locked in the room.
I had decided to stay a little longer to finish a private show with one of my most loyal customers. This was the opportunity to earn a reasonable sum of money, because since midnight I had not been able to collect more than 350 tokens.
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With Paul it was simple. I had become accustomed to please him. As soon as he reached the room, he had to greet him publicly, smile a lot, ask him about his day and make a lot of jokes.
Then, as the conversation flowed I should tell him that I wanted him, that I wanted to be with him alone, that I was dying to have sex with him, to take him to the private show.
Once I achieved my goal, I had to undress to the rhythm of the music, show myself on camera and talk dirty to excite him. Then he took the reins and made me your requests: touch your shouts my name.
I used to do it. I knew how to do it, I also knew that the last two months had been the hardest of my life and I knew that if I did not try hard enough, I would not be able to pay the rent and, much less, cover my food expenses.
Webcam model
Today I have a better relationship with my mother, of more sincerity and less resentment; I have a boyfriend whom I love and live with my sister with whom I adopted a dog: Atlas.
Photo: Jaiver Nieto. TIME
There, in that room, naked and at the mercy of him, there was no room for fatigue or modesty. Although my legs hurt and the fact that although I watched on that television screen, the image I saw was not mine. That was not me.
The dynamics of the webcam
I came to webcam modeling like many other girls, out of necessity. I had just left my house because of problems with my stepfather.
I was 18 years old and I was surviving with the few savings I had left. Before entering this world I tried to get a job in different places. But it is difficult for a young student without experience to be hired.
I remember that when they made me the offer I only thought: I have seen it in many places, everyone talks about it being an opportunity to earn a lot of money and even many college girls talk about how wonderful it is.
It was a large house in the sector of La Floresta, in Medellín. Outside there was a large truck. From the door a camera watched me. Nervous and scared I rang the bell.I was greeted by a voluptuous blonde who invited me to enter a room full of televisions.
In the center, there was a man in front of some monitors in which half-naked girls were seen in several rooms that, I supposed, were on the second floor.
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"Sit down," the blonde said, pointing to an armchair. "My name is Sara, tell me what doubts you have about work."
"I don't know, I'm really new to this." I have no experience and would like to know how it works? What do you need? "I said in a doubtful voice.
" Well, the truth is, this is very simple. We work with three platforms. These pages are public chat rooms, in which many users log in to see you. There they can pay you for various things like touching you, masturbating or even dancing, but there are also private shows. These are achieved with clients who have a lot of money and who are going to pay you per minute so that you are alone with them. How many private do you do depends on what you are willing to do. You are of age, right?
"Yes, I'm 18," I replied.
"Perfect, if you brought your ID, we can start at once."
"Mmm!" Yeah right. But, first I would like to know other things. More than anything, what has to do with privacy and money ...
"Oh!" Of course, as far as privacy is concerned, we block the countries you want so they don't see you here or say if you have family in another country, we block that one too. The truth is very safe, do not worry. And the money, you are paid in tokens that is the currency used in these sites. A token equals $ 0.10 of which 0.05 belongs to the page , that is, the remaining $ 0.05 is divided between you and the study, fifty-fifty.
—And how are the schedules? What happens is that I study.
-The days are eight hours and work every day, may be more depending on the dedication you have. But I assure you that as soon as you start making money the time will be secondary.
When they made me the offer, I thought: I have seen it in many places, they say that it is an opportunity to earn a lot of money and even many girls from the university talk about how wonderful it is
Moments later, I was with the card next to my face while Sara took me photos, then another couple more suggestive, and I was already inside. My induction was to observe the other girls for 30 minutes and listen to a brief explanation of some sex toys that Sara gave me. It was so fast, I don't even know when I was in a room, in underwear and not knowing what to do.
My first fortnight was excellent. In 15 days I managed to make 1,500,000 pesos. I was dazzled by so much money. However, I was working almost 10 hours a day without rest.
As I progressed, and although I had enough followers, I realized that each time entertaining these people was more difficult, it was a very large physical and psychological effort: I speak of very long days in which I had to do countless things to achieve a private, plus the pressure of feeling that you practically have to beg for a token and what you least want is that the fortnight arrives without enough money, because in a job like this you never know.
A form of exploitation
The study was growing and the facilities improved. New girls came in every day. We were all there for the same reason: desire to get ahead for ourselves, our families or to achieve a dream. I wanted to get ahead with my career.
However, as the months went by the profits declined and we were victims of the owners of the studio who wanted to take more and more of us.
In addition, many times I requested to manage my own accounts and they did not allow it. I couldn't see how much I earned and didn't even know my passwords. In short, very hard times came when a fortnight could be 100,000 pesos or less.
The answer was always the same: girls have to try harder, come more hours, in another they compose themselves and things so, instead of reassuring me, they enraged me. With tears in my eyes I shouted at them how they wanted me to live and pay the rent with that money. They ignored me.
As if that were not enough in those months, the owners of the study wanted to make us sign a contract in which they forced us to stay at least one year and in which they completely disposed of us legally.
Webcam model
My first fortnight was excellent. In 15 days I managed to make 1,500,000 pesos.
According to the document, we did not work for them, but we were paying them rent for a room. Therefore , they were not responsible for anything that happened to us, not even an accident on the premises.
They, however, did have right on our earnings and our time and we even could punish money if any We were missing day. In fact, one of the problems of this 'industry' is that there are no regulations that protect women.
I was surprised to realize that if I searched my username on Google, the search engine was going to show a series of photos and videos in which I appeared naked and masturbating.
It was too late, and all that material was on the web, anyone could see it, even my family. Neither the pages nor the studio told me that this woman, man or couple on the other side of the screen could record me and sell my material without any penalty. I was naive and innocent and now I was paying. So I left and decided never to return to that world.
My mom found out and I had to tell her the whole story. For her it was very hard and for me it was also to admit it.
I waited patiently until I got a good job that allows me to practice my English. I closed that stage and continued.
I do not lead a perfect life, I still have difficulties. But, something changed: I promised not to get carried away by false promises.